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Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 11, 2020 21:54

Why was the man happy at the cook-out?


He met the grill of his dreams!

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 11, 2020 22:03

Why did George Foreman put a steak on his head ???


He wanted ta be a griller



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 11, 2020 23:41

Rolling Stones Joke


What do you get when you are lodged between Dwayne Johnson and a Pig?


"Stuck between a Rock and a Lard Place"

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 12, 2020 16:15

Why was the broom late?


Because it over swept

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 13, 2020 13:40

What did the grumpy guy eat on his birthday?


Crab Cake!

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 13, 2020 18:58

Why was the ladder unlucky in love?

It was always stood-up.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2020-08-13 18:58 by Chris Fountain.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 14, 2020 17:11

Why did the Moose go to his family Reunion?

To see his Uncle and Auntlers

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Date: August 14, 2020 17:12

Why do seagulls fly over the sea?


If they flew over the bay they would be bagels.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 14, 2020 17:17

Good One!

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 14, 2020 19:40

Bitter sweet this one .... Baby Seal Rescued with Bolt Cutter ...1000 likes in one day.... [www.youtube.com]

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 14, 2020 21:14

Hey those guys with the seal
did a kind thing ..... i really like that ....thanks Eddie



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 14, 2020 21:55

Quote
Rockman
Hey those guys with the seal
did a kind thing ..... i really like that ....thanks Eddie

No problem..............they do loads everyday on the same beach.......netting, fishing lines, packing straps.....horrendous but I can almost feel the relief when they set them free.............

Hope for paws in LA are an amazing crew too............ [www.youtube.com] ....not that I'd advocate the tutu and necklace.........cool smiley .... Dumped in the desert.... [www.youtube.com] ...confused smiley


One good story I heard was of two Russian guys who rescued a dog from an icy lake, they put it in the back of their car, when they got it to the vet they were told it was a wild wolf.............grinning smileyeye popping smileydrinking smiley



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 2020-08-15 05:15 by EddieByword.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 14, 2020 23:03

I pick up snails from foot paths
and put them back in the garden ....

Saves them hours in journey time ..... does that count as kind ????



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 14, 2020 23:57

Why did the Whale cross the Ocean?

To get to the other Tide.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 15, 2020 02:10

Quote
Rockman
I pick up snails from foot paths
and put them back in the garden ....

Saves them hours in journey time ..... does that count as kind ????

Only if you do worms as well................grinning smiley

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: chris girard ()
Date: August 15, 2020 02:37

I played golf today, it was finally cool enough to play. Its been in the high 90's( 32 C) and with humidity, close to 100 (37C). I live outside of Washington, DC.

I was told that golf was invented in Scotland, and I was also told they invented the word F*CK.

That's my golf joke from across the pond, stay safe, wear your masks.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 15, 2020 03:06

Quote
chris girard
I played golf today, it was finally cool enough to play. Its been in the high 90's( 32 C) and with humidity, close to 100 (37C). I live outside of Washington, DC.

I was told that golf was invented in Scotland, and I was also told they invented the word F*CK.

That's my golf joke from across the pond, stay safe, wear your masks.

.... on that subject of etymology, here's another, most villages, towns and cities in the UK named their redlight districts as Gropecunt St/road/lane/place until about 500 years ago....[en.wikipedia.org] .....mind you, the author Geoffrey Chaucer in the late 1300s use to use the word queynte in that context....



Edited 3 time(s). Last edit at 2020-08-15 03:12 by EddieByword.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 15, 2020 08:49

Only if you do worms as well...............

Well Eddie I did start digging a compost hole
once and then I saw that Id chopped a worm in half ...

Hurt me so much that i had to down shovel but
then my brother told me not ta worry because they
grow another head ....

but hey I've avoided digging holes in dirt ever since ......



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 15, 2020 13:48

Why doesn't the Ginger Man have teeth?


Because of chronic gingervitus

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 15, 2020 17:19

Quote
Rockman
Only if you do worms as well...............

Well Eddie I did start digging a compost hole
once and then I saw that Id chopped a worm in half ...

Hurt me so much that i had to down shovel but
then my brother told me not ta worry because they
grow another head ....

but hey I've avoided digging holes in dirt ever since ......


You're a good man Rockman, you're a good man..............grinning smiley

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: jbwelda ()
Date: August 15, 2020 18:15

I was going to say, you are a kind man Rockman, I appreciate it and so do all living things.

jb

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: August 15, 2020 19:38

What did the owl say to the therapist?


Whooo Whooo am I?

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: SomeTorontoGirl ()
Date: August 15, 2020 19:48

Why did the chicken cross Hollywood Boulevard?

He wanted to see Gregory Peck.

(Edited once ‘cause I told it wrong... grinning smiley)





Edited 2 time(s). Last edit at 2020-08-15 19:50 by SomeTorontoGirl.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: EddieByword ()
Date: August 15, 2020 20:59

New inmate in prison to a lifer...."Why is the psychotherapist's office in a cell?

"No, no, no, that says Psycho-the-rapist......................

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: chris girard ()
Date: August 15, 2020 22:39

Wonderful, it brought a smile to my face.

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Elmo Lewis ()
Date: August 15, 2020 22:52

Why did the condom fly across the room?

He was pissed off.







Think about it.....

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 15, 2020 22:55

Police found a girl dead in a pizza shop
She was covered in ham...cheese and pineapple ....

Investigators said she may have topped herself.



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 15, 2020 23:38

I got a sext from a redhead:
I'm all alone. Come on over. Bring Protection.

So i took SPF50



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: Rockman ()
Date: August 16, 2020 01:47

I just bought a grand piano ......

It was $1000



ROCKMAN

Re: The "Let´s Cheer Us Up" thread
Posted by: jbwelda ()
Date: August 16, 2020 02:35

Bet it was grand, too.

jb

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