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Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Glass Slide ()
Date: January 29, 2009 07:01

Hey there, sir!! I've been MIA. Not much on the Stones front (not sure thats a bad thing, truth be told) and more importantly became partners with this guy who had a solo practice (hence the matrimonial) and basically work 10-12 hours days but I LOVE it. We have 2 offices already and I am down on Wall Street. Its pretty cool. We also have a billboard up on the BQE (pretty chessy, no? LOL).

I've been hanging mostly on guitar sites (been playing a ton-keep one in the office, lol) but I like to check in once in a while and mostly read (LOVED your comment about "the greatest R&R band in the world).

I JUST had to comment on this thread (even had to get a password, its been THAT long) because I see this every day and I don't wish this on anyone AND it NEVER goes as planned.

How are you? What happened to the "other moniker"? Btw, I KNEW it was you by the writing style-(thats a compliment). Great to "hear" from you!

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: little queenie ()
Date: January 29, 2009 08:08

hi glass slide - i had wondered what happened to you too! happy new year! congrats on the partnership!

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Glass Slide ()
Date: January 29, 2009 08:10

Thanks--Queenie, that's very sweet---Happy New Years to you too!

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: T&A ()
Date: January 29, 2009 15:15

Quote
Glass Slide
Hey there, sir!! I've been MIA. Not much on the Stones front (not sure thats a bad thing, truth be told) and more importantly became partners with this guy who had a solo practice (hence the matrimonial) and basically work 10-12 hours days but I LOVE it. We have 2 offices already and I am down on Wall Street. Its pretty cool. We also have a billboard up on the BQE (pretty chessy, no? LOL).

I've been hanging mostly on guitar sites (been playing a ton-keep one in the office, lol) but I like to check in once in a while and mostly read (LOVED your comment about "the greatest R&R band in the world).

I JUST had to comment on this thread (even had to get a password, its been THAT long) because I see this every day and I don't wish this on anyone AND it NEVER goes as planned.

How are you? What happened to the "other moniker"? Btw, I KNEW it was you by the writing style-(thats a compliment). Great to "hear" from you!

good to hear things are well with you. the other moniker and i got into a scrape and...long story short, t&a won the iorr custody battle. more evidence that divorce is an ugly thing....you're right.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: The Sicilian ()
Date: January 29, 2009 16:06

Just remember that it is always the man's fault. Even if the woman is cheating, it is because the man's actions caused this behavior.

Listen to or read any female talk show or column and see my point. All sympathies for women only.

Start with Suzy Orman.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: VoodooLounge13 ()
Date: January 29, 2009 16:11

It's all very depressing, I must admit. But on a positive note, the new one had a very low opinion of the Stones, and I made her a CD of songs, and she's completely rethought them now! My wife...she could care less if she ever goes to another Stones show - hell that right there is grounds for divorce I think!

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: HelterSkelter ()
Date: January 29, 2009 16:33

Quote
VoodooLounge13
VOODOOLOUNGE13 Explains the basic promblem.....

I said it was a loooong story best summed up as that. It's not the driving reason. One of the very main reasons is that I want more kids, my wife doesn't. In fact this is steadily growing to be the main reason. I made a mistake some 7.5 years ago and she got pregnant. We very nearly aborted it, and at the last minute we both decided we couldn't actually go thru with it so we went the opposite and got married, not wanting to have b@st@ard child and all. Seeing my daughter and how close we were to killing her made me overturn my support for abortion mostly - but that's a whole other issue lol. When we married I hoped to one day be able to learn to love her, and I guess for a while I did, but it's long since gone. We are also separate on religion in large degrees, and I feel like the chasm is simply widening, as happiness is something that's been lacking for a long time now. Might even venture to say this level has not existed my entire life.

And that's the strangest part - there's been no conjugal aspect to it all, which for me makes it all the more deeper and rewarding. I'm ok with being at lower income levels, it's the thought of not being able to give the new person what I could currently give the wife.[/quote]

Glad you were open enough to explain the situation Voodoo. I would "follow your heart" and go with this new one... man, if I would have stuck with my first serious GF we would have killed each other by now -decades later. Other serious GF's that came later were better but the one I have now is the best,so,it pays to take your time and to switch only if very seriously needed for life long happiness. Always treat the ex with politeness and respect - she deserves it......

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: T&A ()
Date: January 29, 2009 17:15

dumping a gf for another gf is not quite in the same league as divorcing over another....

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: sweetcharmedlife ()
Date: January 29, 2009 17:30

Quote
The Sicilian
Just remember that it is always the man's fault. Even if the woman is cheating, it is because the man's actions caused this behavior.

Listen to or read any female talk show or column and see my point. All sympathies for women only.

Start with Suzy Orman.

Suze Orman wouldn't know anything about marriage.....Not with a man anyway.

"It's just some friends of mine and they're busting down the door"

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: skipstone ()
Date: January 29, 2009 17:39

It might be and probably is 'cheaper to keep her' but mentally it's a waste of life.

It's only money.

As my friend says about any hot woman he sees - somewhere someone is sick of her shit.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: VoodooLounge13 ()
Date: January 29, 2009 18:49

Quote
skipstone
It might be and probably is 'cheaper to keep her' but mentally it's a waste of life.

It's only money.

As my friend says about any hot woman he sees - somewhere someone is sick of her shit.

LMFAO This might be the quote of the year!! Though the Dakota saying comes a close second. LOL

And it feels like a waste of life, but what about all the anguish that is involved with it all? Tearing the kids away from the home they love because they can roam the acres, explore the stream, catch you name it...you're all right I'd be hated forever for upturning that. It's a tough fin position to be in.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: The Sicilian ()
Date: January 29, 2009 18:51

Quote
skipstone
As my friend says about any hot woman he sees - somewhere someone is sick of her shit.

Never thought about it that way but it does make sense.

Or one I've heard "Never trust a white woman after 2 drinks"

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Chris Fountain ()
Date: January 29, 2009 19:01

Suze Orman wouldn't know anything about marriage.....Not with a man anyway.

SCL, Everyone thinks she is a financial expert as well. How difficult is it for someone to say " If you owe $10,000 you really should reconsider getting your dog a manicure?"

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: skipstone ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:35

Tearing the kids away? If you're married and have children and are not getting along and the kids see that, WTF kind of example is THAT? Stick it out? For what? For who? For how long? That's living a lie. That's not living.

Yeah, get the fvck out - tear it all up, blow it all up. Because it does make it better. If at least one parent can get their shit together and a head on straight, that makes all the difference in the world. Not things like a house or all that superficial shit. Real shit.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Bingo ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:47

I was happy as hell when my father left my mother...I guess mom told him he should leave.

It's all good now.


Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: ohnonotyouagain ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:48

No amount of money in the world is worth being stuck in a dead relationship. Screw the money, do what makes you happy.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: T&A ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:50

Quote
ohnonotyouagain
No amount of money in the world is worth being stuck in a dead relationship. Screw the money, do what makes you happy.

that's so 80's....and look what happened then. these days we make ourselves happy by pleasing those around us. please take note.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: VoodooLounge13 ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:53

...Hence the situation I'm in. Please others before myself.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: ohnonotyouagain ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:54

Quote
T&A
Quote
ohnonotyouagain
No amount of money in the world is worth being stuck in a dead relationship. Screw the money, do what makes you happy.

that's so 80's....and look what happened then. these days we make ourselves happy by pleasing those around us. please take note.

I thought the 80s mantra was "greed is good." This advice is the opposite of that, no?

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: T&A ()
Date: January 29, 2009 20:57

Quote
VoodooLounge13
...Hence the situation I'm in. Please others before myself.

the pleasure is all yours

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Date: January 30, 2009 21:51

I recommend you to move to Sweden.
Conflict is often solved by a family advisor;
and both parts get a lot of money to live alone.

Its the country of the broken & damaged families.

Totally seriously my divorced worked out well;
and my sincere piece of advice is: stay friends with yer X.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: sweetcharmedlife ()
Date: January 30, 2009 21:58

Quote
The Sicilian
Quote
skipstone
As my friend says about any hot woman he sees - somewhere someone is sick of her shit.

Never thought about it that way but it does make sense.

Or one I've heard "Never trust a white woman after 2 drinks"

Ok,that one really did make me laugh out loud.>grinning smiley<

"It's just some friends of mine and they're busting down the door"

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Slim Harpo ()
Date: January 30, 2009 22:49

VoodooLounge wtf are you unloading all this here for?

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Date: January 30, 2009 22:58

Maybe coz he feel himself like at home here?

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: BluzDude ()
Date: January 31, 2009 00:36

Quote
Slim Harpo
VoodooLounge wtf are you unloading all this here for?

Friendships do develop here

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Tornandfrayed ()
Date: January 31, 2009 02:34

Quote
skipstone
somewhere someone is sick of her shit.

An instant classic. thumbs up

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: Slim Harpo ()
Date: January 31, 2009 13:09

Quote
BluzDude
Quote
Slim Harpo
VoodooLounge wtf are you unloading all this here for?

Friendships do develop here

Sure, but it's undignified and shows a total lack of respect for Mrs Lounge13 to indulge in this washing your dirty laundry in public. This is a private family matter which affects other people and doesn't need airing on here, imo. And the anonymity could be construed as cowardice.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: VoodooLounge13 ()
Date: February 2, 2009 17:18

It is a private matter, but I was looking for some advice. I'm an only child, and my parents certainly won't be in my corner because they weren't the last time I tried leaving, and I know they won't this time either. "The kids and all" they'd say, "Think about the kids." I really don't have a lot of close friends having been burned by most of them over the course of my life, and my closest one died a couple of years ago, so I thought the anonymity provided here would allow me to collect opinions without gettin incriminated at all since my wife doesn't even know the name of this website.

Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: shortfatfanny ()
Date: February 2, 2009 17:35

Quote
VoodooLounge13
In light of Ronnie's eminent divorce, I'm wondering if there are any divorced dads here, and what the price is for child support and alimony. Realizing that all terms vary by state and what not so it'd be hard pressed to find someone here divorced from NY. I'm just trying to figure out a rough ballpark without going to an attorney just yet. I mean for simplicity's sake, let's say I made $100K a year, does half of that go to the ex and kids, 70%? 80%? Not looking for anyone's numbers. Just how much I could stand to lose, ballparked.

Voodoo,I don´t mind discussing that special one here...
I think you´ve allready made up your mind,seems,..,because otherwise you
wouldn´t ask for advice how expensive it´ll be.

From my own experience (ok,20 years ago,but some experiences one needs to make just
once in a lifetime) I may tell you,that your decision is made.
Love is completely gone ? Not a single chance ? Then leave her,better for the kids,for your wife AND for you.
I can´t tell you how much it will cost,but living a lie is more expensive and
leads finally to a desaster.
It will be hard in the beginning (for all) but after a while ,with respecting
each other,you´ll be happy,believe me.
Take good care of your kids and yourself,
Good Luck


Re: Semi-OT: Divorce
Posted by: sweet neo con ()
Date: February 2, 2009 17:42

Voodoo.....forgive me if I did not read every post on this thread but
can you sum it up in 2 lines?? It seems you want to divorce a woman
because she doesn't want more kids.....yet you admit that you never
really loved her anyway. (???) More kids with someone you don't love???

2 other things that you said also stood out:

1) the belief that you always "please others before yourself"...and
2) that you've been "burned" by most of your friends over the course of your life.

Not trying to kick you when you're down...but if you're really looking for
anonymous advice/"tough love"...you need to stop the pity-party and stop playing the
victim. Be a little more introspective. We all make choices and deal with
consequences. If there wasn't a child involved it would be easier but
take responsibility...and get professional help to do what you can to mend things.
obviously there are many legitimate reasons to get divorced but exhaust all
of your options first. good luck i'm sure it's very tough.


IORR............but I like it!



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2009-02-02 18:12 by sweet neo con.

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