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Des
Sweetcharmedlife naild it.

If you are not familiar with the joke get the movie "the Aristocrats" a documentary of comics performing the worlds dirtiest joke.

Evidentaly several comics have said this is the funniest delivery of a single joke ever. The movie is not for the sqweemish.

Once again SCL, you get all the credit ><

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SomeTorontoGirl




A classic, even without the elephant...

Video response:

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SomeTorontoGirl




A classic, even without the elephant...

Elephant...Looks more like an ass to me...

"It's just some friends of mine and they're busting down the door"

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BluzDude

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Des
Sweetcharmedlife naild it.

If you are not familiar with the joke get the movie "the Aristocrats" a documentary of comics performing the worlds dirtiest joke.

Evidentaly several comics have said this is the funniest delivery of a single joke ever. The movie is not for the sqweemish.

Once again SCL, you get all the credit ><

It's more like half the credit and all the blame Bluz

"It's just some friends of mine and they're busting down the door"

South Park. Playing acoustic on guitar hero. I thought that was clever and funny.
Simpsons. The Movie. The nude Bart dick/French Fry (Chip) exposed wozza / skateboard joke.Funny.

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Edith Grove
Video response, etc etc:

A Wedgie with Extreme Prejudice!

... Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Left-hand drivers version:




Right-hand drivers version:

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.



The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, is why we now have the pleasure
of enjoying it as well:


Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle 's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle 's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over! The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+





Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2009-01-15 22:09 by Bingo.

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Des
Duane in Huston.....

I have seen this translated. The talk show is featuring folks who have suffered some acident with perminent disabilities. Now the guy being interviewed had his testicles removed. He just happens to have this high voice. The moderator picks up on the irony of the situation and can't control himself.

It's a parody of the situation you described. IT'S NOT REAL

Bingo knows funny stuff when he sees it.

This is off the charts funny :

"funny/historic"...

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Edith Grove

You know what's really funny? EG did you see the cat in a bong thread on RO?

"It's just some friends of mine and they're busting down the door"

This is funny:








Universal Mistakenly Presses the Fall Album Instead of Teen Got Talent Winner
3/3/2009 By Brock Thiessen

A lot of Brits almost got a rude introduction to the Fall this month following quite the major slip-up over at Universal UK. Apparently, the initial pressings the label received of the debut album by 13-year-old Got Talent winner Faryl Smith actually contained copies of Mark E. Smith’s 2008 Fall album Imperial Wax Solvent, meaning those expecting to hear the young pop tart’s renditions of "Amazing Grace" and "Ave Maria" would have been in quite the surprise when they heard "Wolf Kidult Man" and "Senior Twilight Stock Replacer" instead.

According to the UK’s Sun newspaper, the pressing error led to some rapid back-pedaling from Universal and some rather choice words to the pressing plant, which apparently made hundreds of incorrect copies.

And while it would have been priceless to see the reaction Mark E. Smith’s bitter, old grumblings would have incited from unwary listeners, Universal is now reportedly disposing of the mispressed CDs

The correct (and likely way lamer) version of Faryl Smith’s album, Faryl, is out March 9.

[www.exclaim.ca]

Three Things In Life (and it's Cut Off, Louisiana in case anyone is wondering)

The madam opened the brothel door in Baton Rouge and saw a rather
dignified, well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early
fifties.

'May I help you sir?' she asked.
'I want to see Valerie,' the man replied.
'Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would
prefer someone else' said the madam.
'No, I must see Valerie,' he replied. Just then, Valerie appeared and
announced to the man she charged $5000 a visit.Without hesitation, the
man pulled out five thousand dollars and gave it to Valerie, and they went upstairs.
After an hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the man appeared again, once more demanding to see
Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights
in a row as she was too expensive. But there were no discounts. The
price was still $5000. Again, the man pulled out the money, gave it to
Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was
astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid
Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie
questioned the man, 'No one has ever been with me three nights in a
row. Where are you from?' she asked. The man replied, 'Cut Off'.

'Really', she said. 'I have family in Cut Off'.

'I know.' the man said. 'Your sister died and I am her attorney. She
asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance'.

The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain.
1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawyer

This is funny...after the 20 second mark...

Eric and Ernie!










"As we say in England, it can get a bit trainspottery"

Only in America:

Click the "HD" button

[www.hulu.com]

Great SNL bit

Featuring Jim Price :

And for the Germans amongst us.Let'see if BV doesnt remove it..

Watched this film for the first time last night. This scene is fantastic!





Wasn't looking too good, but I was feeling real well.