I defy anyone to come up with anything funnier than this:

"I saw the lights of Marfa, I guess it was a scenic route
When I had to change a tire, I’m glad I wore my western boots"

A country boy in the midst of a minor crisis with a foremost concern for fashion.

It doesn't get better than that. The pinnacle.





From No Spare Parts - other lyrical highlights as well:

No Spare Parts

Your daddy drank himself half to death when he was 39 years old
But I hope you don’t think I feel like a father to you
But I want to tell you I miss you so much, you’re a thousand miles away
I’m at the wheel of my car and I’m coming on home to you, yeah

Lonely hearts, they’re not made to break
I got no spare parts, got no oil to change

Honey, I ain’t accustomed to lose
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through

I take the 10 to Phoenix, be in Tucson by the afternoon
Get some shut eye and pizza and a bite at the greasy spoon
Took a turn off 90, I should have stayed on the interstate
I was lost in the real, my map was kind of out of date

I saw the lights of Marfa, I guess it was a scenic route
When I had to change a tire, I’m glad I wore my western boots

Lonely hearts, they’re not made to break
I got no spare parts, got no oil to change

Honey, I ain’t accustomed to lose
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through
Honey, I ain’t accustomed to lose
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through, yeah
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through, yes

When I got to Sonora, the sun was shining in my eyes
With the air-con busted, the windshield full of flies
In just a few hours, you’re going to fall in my loving arms
I've been so hot to see you, I set off the fire alarms, yeah

Lonely Hearts, they’re not made to break
I got no spare parts, got no oil to change

Honey, I ain’t accustomed to lose
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get it, baby
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through
If I want something bad enough, I always find a way to get through, yeah

Lonely hearts, they’re not made to break
I got no oil to change, yeah
Lonely hearts, they’re not made to break
I got no spare parts, got no oil to change

Quote
treaclefingers
I defy anyone to come up with anything funnier than this:

"I saw the lights of Marfa, I guess it was a scenic route
When I had to change a tire, I’m glad I wore my western boots"

Everything from the track The Queen is Dead.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2015-04-07 01:57 by Bastion.

I believe he says "shuteye in Benson". That's a town on 10 east of Tucson. I know that route well, and it was delightful to hear a song about it.

Always loved the sardonic humour of Far Away Eyes.

She's da Boss .........



ROCKMAN

Quote
SomeTorontoGirl
Always loved the sardonic humour of Far Away Eyes.

Definitely a good one, like its forebear Dear Doctor.

I also like Melody:

She took my trailer home, she took my Sunday booze

I'm looking for her high and low like a mustard for a ham

etc.

So I did...............

Once upon a time I was your little rooster
Now am I just one of your cocks

"I often threaten my wife with a gun
but I always leave the safety on.
I recommend it, Claudine"

Oh, maybe a particularly unsavory line about inter-racial fornication from "Some Girls"???...

When you call my name, I salivate like Pavlov's dog...

Quote
winter
...I'm looking for her high and low like a mustard for a ham...

I always thought is was "looking for her high and low like a rooster for a hen"
(but your interpretation is quite funny, if accurate)

She could be an alien
Send her to me


Better tell the fire chief
To quit playing cards



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2015-04-07 03:49 by BitchKeepsBitchin.

Quote
MisterDDDD
When you call my name, I salivate like Pavlov's dog...

Ya learn something new every day! I always thought it was "you sound a bit like a Pavlov dog".

Quote
polythene sam
"I often threaten my wife with a gun
but I always leave the safety on.
I recommend it, Claudine"

oh damn, that one is good, forgot about that!

tricks with fruit were kinda cute,i bet you keep yer pussy clean.

Quote
Bastion

Quote
treaclefingers
I defy anyone to come up with anything funnier than this:

"I saw the lights of Marfa, I guess it was a scenic route
When I had to change a tire, I’m glad I wore my western boots"

Everything from the track The Queen is Dead.

SERIOUSLY?!?!

Mick wrote that for the Smiths? Never knew!

Quote
mitchrambler
tricks with fruit were kinda cute,i bet you keep yer pussy clean.

It's the Eddie Murphy of song lyrics!

"Wait a minute- I need a yellow cab - help me get out of this rain...
Hey- put your umbrella up your ass baby - Wooo Hooo "



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2015-04-07 04:22 by StonesHood.

I have always liked:

Oh there's 20 000 grandmas wave their hankies in the air
And burning up their pensions and shouting It's not fair
There's a regiment of soldiers standing, looking on
And the Queen is bravely shouting What the hell is going on?
With a blood-curdling Tally-ho, she charged into the ranks
And blessed all those grandmas who with their dying breaths screamed Thanks

- Jigsaw Puzzle 1968

stonesstein

Kick me like you did before
I can't even feel the pain no more
Rocks Off, 1972

"where can I get my cock sucked, where can I get my ass fvcked?" Pretty funny and bold for its time.

I cum ever time that she parowets on me.

One of my many favorites is Oh no, not you again... Everybody's talking
showing up their wits, the moon is yellow but I'm like jello staring down your tits. How does he come up with this stuff, I love it.

Quote
71Tele
I believe he says "shuteye in Benson". That's a town on 10 east of Tucson. I know that route well, and it was delightful to hear a song about it.

That's funny...I heard it as, "Take the 10 to Phoenix, be in Tucson by the afternoon, Get some shut eye and some pissin' and a bite at the greasy spoon."

He's calling Tucson just a pit stop on the way to see his true love that he's so hot for that he's gonna "set off the fire alaaaarmmmms."

And I also thought it was, "Saw the lights of Marshall".

Are there official lyrics anywhere??

May be it IS "shut eye in Benson" on repeated listens...???

Quote
polythene sam
"I often threaten my wife with a gun
but I always leave the safety on.
I recommend it, Claudine"

Yes she pistol whipped me once or twice
But she never tried to take my life
What do you think about that, Claudine



To me Claudine is hands down the funniest song the Stones ever did.

The line "Could be the Alien, send her to me" was written by Keith.

Quote
stanlove
To me Claudine is hands down the funniest song the Stones ever did.

According to Bill Wyman, Keith wrote Claudine. Words and all.
Bill isn't in the habit of crediting Keith unnecessarily, so I think we can take that as a fact.

And in Melody it sure is "looking for her high & low like mustard for a ham", which is just plain loveable :E

Oh and for those unfamiliar with the lights of Marfa: [en.wikipedia.org]

The Rolling Stones sure are educational!