think it was already a topic..............but........"Think we'll do a slow blues for you so you get more miserable".........before love in vain....Auckland, New Zealand....Feb. 11, 1973

he's a riot on Garden State 78 - mean as hell, but a riot.

"I take my hat off to you lot ... @#$%&' nice crowd, I tell ya ... Well, we've come here to have a good time,
I don't know how much you had to pay for the @#$%& tickets but I didn't have to pay much."

"Keith says I can play this if I play quietly ... so I will!"

"I think we're gonna do, maybe do a country song. New Jersey's in the country, ain't it? I thought it was."

"I followed her to the station with a toothbrush in my hand."

"Well, delving back into the songbook ... Are you all right? ARE YOU ALL RIGHT!
I bet we haven't got too many girls that are sixteen, but we're gonna do one for them anyways.
This is an old Rod Stewart number that he taught me many years ago, while I was still in kindergarten.
I've forgotten the words but Keith will help me out." :E

"I'd like to get one of my friends in the band to sing for you - a rarely-heard occurrence.
You gonna use your own microphone again, Keith?
Oh, you're gonna have a fag before you sing for so many people!"

"Thank you, Keith - maybe do another one, I mean, they're not satisfied with one, yaknowwhatImean."



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2006-12-03 20:18 by with sssoul.

He said a joke between songs at Thanksgiving in 2005 (Denver). This isn't an exact quote:
What if the pilgrims ate cat for Thanksgiving instead of turkey. We'd all be eating pussy today.

"This scarf's in the wrong group", Seattle 18/7/75 during band intros whilst picking up a tartan scarf thrown on the stage and placing it round Ronnie's neck.

"The wonder of Jimi Hendrix was that he could stand up at all he was so pumped full of drugs." Patsy, Patsy Stone

its a pretty well known line as it is included on Still Life, but I really like the "Drink A few beers, smoking a few joints at home" line.

On a COLD Chicago night in October 06 - "I can't feel me feet!!"

"it's great to be here in columbus"


yeah right - HAHAHAHAHAH!

you can't catch me!

Well more weird than funny but..... just before She's So Cold.....Hartford 9 November 1981

My my my my....I'm on runnin'...I want runnin'...I feel good..I wanna come right out..right out..right out raa raa up da...up the amp and I'm gonna suck your pussy......



ROCKMAN

October 6th, 2006, while playing at Regina, Saskatchewan, Mick Jagger referred to the city as "the city that rhymes with fun." (as local radio stations had been billing the city leading up to the concerts). Two days later, on the October 8, 2006 concert, Mick Jagger promised the mayor of Regina that he wouldnt make any jokes about the fact that the name of the town rhymes with a certain part of the female anatomy. He then said that he hoped he didn't sound like a pussy (to which the crowd laughed).

from: [en.wikipedia.org]

to the dodger stadium crowd last week:

"you're a @#$%& great audience!"

you can't catch me!

Hey with sssoul- did you memorize those or go back and listen? I have that boot from when it first came out.

Here's some more from 78:

Cleveland 78- (something like)- "We can't play standin' up, we can't play sittin' down. But we're gonna play anyway".

Memphis 78- "Has anyone got a pick for Keef. UUGGGHHHHHH"

don't give me that ole one two, one two three four

Only through hearsay, and paraphrase--I wasn't there:

Beacon, October, 29th, 2006, to the audience for Bill Clinton's BD gig:

It's so nice to see the President here...(pause)...


I see she brought her husband, Bill.

said under his breath "what interest rate on cash are we getting?"

In Shanghai 2006...
A close approximation..."I am so glad the Chinese government is protecting the morals of all the international bankers and their girlfriends (referring to the censoring of their setlist), we're gonna do a song called BITCH!"

In Seattle this year he said that it was so cold in Chicago that his balls froze off. I guess he says some funny things from time to time.

From 1972 (Philly or Fort Worth, can't remember which) after Keith breaks a guitar string before Gimme Shelter:

"A few strings busted, a few hearts broken, is not a lot to wait for, between friends."

We're gonna do one for all the girls who left their tampax at home. - Several times on the 1981 tour before "Let It Bleed".

El Mocambo side on Love You Live:

"If you feel like dancin;....wait."

"Ronnie Wood's gay"

I forget exactly which show where, but he said, "Are there any special requests from the audience?" You could hear someone yell "Satisfaction!" and they rolled in to it.

at hampden park glasgow in june 1990.

keith said " ive cut my finger, who gives a sh1t"

didnt think much of it at the time but the stones had to cancel a few shows days later cos of his cut finger.

We should start a funny keith lines onstage thread.

Pleased to meet you......

- edit -



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2006-12-04 19:59 by Erik_Snow.

In Twickenham I... refering to Wembley (would fit to the Wembley thread)


"It will be open in time, for the Arctic Monkeys Farewell Tour"

(Adrian L. posted it last month as well)

"Once I was a rich man. Now I am so poor."

"These lights are burning my ass!!!"

-Beacon '06, Show 2



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2006-12-05 04:50 by danielb.

Probably not that funny but a moment of Stones history! Stockholm 4 September 1970: Mick introduced Prodigal Son (done as a duet with Keith) with the following words: "This is a Glimmer Twin section".
Though the phrase was created a year before when the two were on a crusade meeting an old lady who kept on asking them "I know you. Who are you? Give me a glimmer." the term Glimmer Twins came officially to life in 1974.

>> on a crusade <<

smile: it was a cruise they were on - but i like the crusade idea better.
have some popcorn. :E

" are you feeling good now? Are you feeling a bit more relaxed? I feel like stroking everybody. STROKE me, Billy"

Everything he said in 1975 is great. He was spontanous and when Keith was late with his bridge in IYCRM (Hot as hell bootleg), in LA (think it is), he even sings badabadadbabao, and Keith wakes up and does his bit. Sure was hot as hell there.