Two rock musicians named are best friends, have hung out and played together for years. Tragically, one of them gets hit and killed by a bus. A week later, the other one is asleep in his room, when suddenly he feels a "presence" in the room.

He sits upright in bed and hears a voice say "John?....John?" He responds, "BOB! Is that YOU? Where ARE you?!" Bob replies, "I'm in heaven, John." Bob says, "Wow, so what's the scene like in heaven?" Bob says, "Amazing, dude. You would not BELIEVE the jam sessions up here! Yesterday, I jammed with both Hendrix and Stevie Ray for about an hour. This morning, I hooked up with Otis Redding and James Brown on some smokin' tunes, and this afternoon I get to sit in with Muddy and Howlin' Wolf fora killer blues session!"

John says, "WOW! So, it's PERFECT, right?"

Bob says, "Well, not quite.

God has this girlfriend.....

..........who sings......."


:-)

Thank you, Mongoose!

Q. What do you call a man surrounded by musicians?

A. A drummer!

who is this girlfriend ? Janis Joplin ?

Ethel Merman.

What is the difference between a rock and roll drummer, and an extra large pizza?

An extra large pizza CAN feed a family of four.

What's a drummer without girl friend? - homeless



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 2016-07-22 21:21 by slewan.

what did the Grateful Dead fan said when he went out of drugs? - This band sucks

Q: What's the difference between an onion and a banjo?
A: No one cries when you cut up a banjo.

-------

Q: How many lead guitarists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: 10. 1 to do it and nine others to say they could do it faster with better tone.

-------

Q: How does a vocalist screw in a light bulb?
A: They hold the blub in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them.

-------

Q: How do improve the gas mileage of a working musicians car?
A: Remove the pizza delivery sing from the roof.

-------

Q: How do you know if a stage is level?
A: Drool flows equally out of both sides of the drummer's mouth.

Peace,
Mr DJA

Quote
Harlem Shuffler
Q. What do you call a man surrounded by musicians?

A. A drummer!

The version of this joke that I've heard is:

Q: What do you call a guy that likes to drink a lot of beer and hang out with musicians?

A: A drummer.

Cue rimshot.

Q: What do you call a drummer in a 3 piece suit?

A: The defendant.

Quote
Roscoe

Quote
Harlem Shuffler
Q. What do you call a man surrounded by musicians?

A. A drummer!

The version of this joke that I've heard is:

Q: What do you call a guy that likes to drink a lot of beer and hang out with musicians?

A: A drummer.

Cue rimshot.

The way the joke works is to not specify the gender of the person, as in "What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?" , which seems to imply " a groupie," but then you come in with the zinger "A drummer!" Too late now.

"As we say in England, it can get a bit trainspottery"

LOL !!

A band finds a genie in a bottle.
The band can make one wish to come true.
"We'd like a bridge from Los Angeles to Tokyo, that would make touring easier".
The genie replies "Ah man, can't you wish for something else? I'll never find the resources".
"OK", says the band, "please make the drummer write songs as well".
Silence.
Then the genie hesitatingly: "where should that bridge start?"

Quote
Mongoose
God has this girlfriend.....

..........who sings......."


:-)

I'm afraid I don't get it.

Quote
Koen

Quote
Mongoose
God has this girlfriend.....

..........who sings......."


:-)

I'm afraid I don't get it.

He thinks he might be in trouble because he......God's girlfriend...........

He slept with her? And who's the girlfriend?

No no no no - the girlfriend joins in all these great jams, ruining them with her singing
because that's what girlfriends do The joke might work better on a Wings or Plastic Ono forum

Keith dies at a ripe old age and enters the afterlife, not sure if it is heaven or hell. But he finds himself in a studio getting ready to jam with Hendrix, Elvis, Bowie, Prince, Scotty Moore and Graham Parsons.

He's overjoyed. "Man this is heaven. What did I do to deserve this?"

At that moment, Karen Carpenter walks in and sits down at the drum kit and says "OK hit it boys"

HBK

Here's another.

A journalist investigating the treatment of Native Americans in the old west arrives at the army fort near the indian camp and is met by a native guide and interpreter.

As they are loading his luggage into the horse drawn wagon they can hear tribal drums in the distance.

Suddenly the drums stop and the guide becomes visibly alarmed "Uh oh. Drums stop. Very bad."

"Why is that bad?" asks the worried reporter.

The guide replies grimly shaking his head, "Bass solo coming"


HBK

Quote
with sssoul
No no no no - the girlfriend joins in all these great jams, ruining them with her singing
because that's what girlfriends do The joke might work better on a Wings or Plastic Ono forum

Oh, I see, and being God's girlfriend she has to be in..........

What do you call a musician in New Orleans without a girlfriend?

Homeless.

Quote
with sssoul
No no no no - the girlfriend joins in all these great jams, ruining them with her singing
because that's what girlfriends do The joke might work better on a Wings or Plastic Ono forum

Hahaha, thanks, now I get it!

Not quite sure whether "singing" is the correct term for this:

video: [www.dailymotion.com]

A 'C', an E-flat, and a 'G' go into a bar. The bartender says: "Sorry, but we don't serve minors."

So, the E-flat leaves, and the C and the G have an open fifth between them. After a few drinks, the fifth is diminished: the G is out flat. An F comes in and tries to augment the situation, but is not sharp enough.

A D comes into the bar and heads straight for the bathroom saying, "Excuse me. I'll just be a second." An A comes into the bar, but the bartender is not convinced that this relative of C is not a minor. Then the bartender notices a B-flat hiding at the end of the bar and exclaims: "Get out now! You're the seventh minor I've found in this bar tonight."

The E-flat, not easily deflated, comes back to the bar the next night in a 3-piece suit with nicely shined shoes. The bartender says: "You're looking sharp tonight, come on in! This could be a major development."

This proves to be the case, as the E-flat takes off the suit, and everything else, and stands there au natural.

Eventually, the C sobers up, and realizes in horror that he's under a rest. The C is brought to trial, is found guilty of contributing to the diminution of a minor, and is sentenced to 10 years of DS without Coda at an upscale correctional facility. On appeal, however, the C is found innocent of any wrongdoing, even accidental, and that all accusations to the contrary are bassless.


On the internet nobody knows
you're Mick Jagger

Q: How do you get a bass player off your porch?
A: Pay for the pizza.

Q: what do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?
A: A flat minor.

Quote
Harlem Shuffler
Q. What do you call a man surrounded by musicians?

A. A drummer!

The variation I heard was:

"A drummer is a musician's best friend."

Quote
loog droog

Quote
Harlem Shuffler
Q. What do you call a man surrounded by musicians?

A. A drummer!

The variation I heard was:

"A drummer is a musician's best friend."

I don't get it.